Patricia Sands

Author

women's support group

Girlfriends are good for your health …

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A friend just sent this to me and I want to share it with you.

They Teach It at Stanford

As reported by a woman who had just finished taking  an evening class at Stanford. The last lecture was on the mind-body connection – the relationship between stress and disease. The speaker (head  of psychiatry at Stanford) said, among other things, that one of the best things that a man could do for his health is to be married to a woman whereas for a  woman, one of the best things she could do for her health was to nurture her relationships with her girlfriends.

At first everyone laughed, but he was serious.

Women connect with each other differently and  provide support systems that help each other to deal with stress and difficult  life experiences. Physically this quality “girlfriend time” helps us to create more serotonin – a neurotransmitter that helps combat depression and can create a general feeling of well being.  Women share feelings whereas men often form relationships around activities. They rarely sit down with a buddy and talk about how they feel about certain things or how their personal lives are going. Jobs? Yes. Sports? Yes. Cars? Yes. Fishing, hunting, golf?

Yes.  But their feelings? Rarely.

Women do it all of the time. We share from our souls with our sisters/mothers, and evidently that is very good for our health.  He said that spending time with a friend is just as important to our general health as jogging or working out at a gym.

There’s a tendency to think that when we are “exercising” we  are doing something good for our bodies, but when we are hanging out with friends, we are wasting our time and should be more productively engaged—not true. In fact, he said that failure to create and maintain quality personal relationships with other humans is as dangerous to our physical health as smoking!

So every time you hang out to schmooze with a gal pal, just pat yourself on the back and congratulate yourself for doing something good for your health! We are indeed very, very lucky. Sooooo let’s toast to our friendship with our girlfriends. Evidently it’s very good for our health.”

 

More about TBC characters- Jane

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Wow! It’s been fun to hear how many of you related to the Sea To Sky Highway, Jane’s favourite drive (Chapter 3). It’s an awesome drive from Horseshoe Bay, just north of Vancouver, along the coast and then carved out of the steep cliffs overlooking the always breathtakingly beautiful Howe Sound, up past the in-your-face monolith The Chief in Squamish, to the abundant pleasures of Whistler and beyond to the open valley spaces of Pemberton. The Duffey Lake Road takes over from there to Lillooet. It’s all part of Highway 99 and prior to the major improvements for the 2010 Olympics, this section has a checkered history. Fifty years ago it was a two-lane undivided highway with no outside barrier. White-knuckle driving, I well remember! In those days, a number of motorists lost their lives due to inclement weather, poor visibility, speeding, passing slower vehicles, or drunk driving. Local media have called it variously the “Killer Highway”, the “Highway of Death”, and the “Ski-And-Die Highway”. Not infrequent rockslides have also added “Sea-To-Slide Highway”. Negativity aside, this drive is often in the top ten of “beautiful drives you must do” in travel magazines. Click here for photos
I knew when I began my novel that somehow I would work this drive and skiing in Whistler into the story. It’s a passionate part of my history. So I gave those same passions to the character Jane whose zest for life grew from her childhood summers in those spectacular surroundings. Perhaps it was that same zest for life that allowed her to come to terms with her sexuality and recognize who she was with grace and ease. Some might say surprisingly so. I have no doubt it was that same zest for life so appreciated and admired by the rest of The Bridge Club that helped them overcome the shock of her announcement and support her on her journey. Friendship at it’s finest, although not without some hurdles – that’s the women of The Bridge Club.

Let’s begin 2011 by answering some questions

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Ok – the decorations have all been carefully put away for another year. The suitcases have been unpacked. The last of the shortbread has mysteriously vanished. It was a wonderful holiday season and now it’s time to get back to business.

THANK YOU TO ALL THE READERS WHO TAKE THE TIME TO WRITE TO ME. I CAN’T TELL YOU HOW REWARDING IT IS AND HOW MUCH I VALUE YOUR FEEDBACK AND YOUR STORIES ABOUT YOUR OWN GROUP OF FRIENDS.

I’ve decided the first challenge I’m going to tackle in 2011, from a very long list, is to answer some of the questions I’m receiving from readers about different characters in The Bridge Club. Today let’s talk about Cass!

Yes, her character in real life did in fact live on a sailboat on the other side of the Atlantic for eight years with the man in her life at that time. Her experience was very much as described in the novel and she and I spent many long hours talking and reminiscing as I developed the chapter. She did indeed make tapes and send them to us from time to time which we then returned to her. It was a fantastic way to stay connected and of course long before the days of computers. If only  we had been able to Skype! The journey came to an end as described and she did meet her current employer a few years later when she worked as a cook on his yacht. Even though she made some very unconventional choices in her life, everything somehow worked out. Her relationship with her son is strong and he is a fine young man. To the rest of our group, in her real life the model for Cass really does exemplify the saying to “dance as if no one is watching”. She is proof that for some women, thinking outside the box is the way to go. It has certainly worked for her! If you have a dream, pursue it.

Thanks again Dan!

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In the blink of an eye we are back in Toronto. The nine wonderful days in Whistler flew by. Christmas with some of our family out there was a very special time and Mother Nature co-operated by providing a magical winter wonderland. Ski conditions were fabulous even though the upper mountains were closed because they had TOO MUCH SNOW! Oh for that problem at our southern Ontario ski areas! Thanks once again to Dan and his very helpful staff at Armchair Books in Whistler Village for hosting a book-signing for The Bridge Club. It was a most enjoyable afternoon full of friendly, interesting people – locals and tourists alike. Great fun! More and more book clubs are discovering The Bridge Club and its many points for discussion. Thanks for letting me know!